Life Is in the Transitions
Mastering Change at Any Age
(Sprache: Englisch)
From the New York Times bestselling author of The Secrets of Happy Families and Council of Dads, a pioneering study of the disruptions upending contemporary life and a bold guide for how to navigate life's growing number of transitions with more meaning,...
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From the New York Times bestselling author of The Secrets of Happy Families and Council of Dads, a pioneering study of the disruptions upending contemporary life and a bold guide for how to navigate life's growing number of transitions with more meaning, balance, and joy.Bruce Feiler has long been writing about the stories that give our lives meaning. Recently he began to notice a new pattern: Many of us feel overwhelmed by the unprecedented pace of change we're experiencing. We know that our old stories, with their predictable plot points along linear paths, no longer hold true. The idea that we'll have one job, one relationship, one source of happiness is hopelessly outdated. Yet we're unnerved by all this upheaval. We're concerned that our lives are not what we expected; that we're veering off course; living life out of order.
Galvanized by a personal crisis and family emergency, Feiler set out on what became an epic journey. He crisscrossed the country, collecting hundreds of life stories from Americans of all ages, all walks of life, and in all fifty states. He then spent a year coding these stories, identifying patterns and takeaways for how we live now and how can live better. But we're not alone.
Life Is in the Transitions introduces a fresh, illuminating vision of the nonlinear life, in which each of us faces dozens of disruptors. Drawing on his extraordinary trove of insights, Feiler unveils a powerful new transition toolkit with proven strategies for coping with these pivotal, painful, unsettling times. From a master storyteller with a timely message, Life Is in the Transitions can move readers of any age to think deeply about times of personal change and how to transform them into periods of creativity and growth.
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INTRODUCTIONThe Life Story Project
What Happens When Our Fairy Tales Go Awry
I used to believe that phone calls don t change your life, until one day I got a phone call that did. It was from my mother. Your father is trying to kill himself.
He s what?
Suddenly she was talking and I wasn t really following. Something about a bathroom, a razor, a desperate lunge for relief.
Good God.
And that wasn t the last time. Later he tried to climb out of a window while I was scrambling eggs.
As a writer, I m often asked whether I learned to write from my dad. The answer is no. My father was uncommonly friendly, even twinkling we called him a professional Savannahian, for the seaside city in Georgia where he d lived for eighty years but he was more of a listener and a doer than a teller and a scribbler. A navy veteran, civic leader, Southern Demo- crat, he was never depressed a minute in his life.
Until he got Parkinson s, a disease that affects your mobility and your mood. My dad s father, who also got the disease late in life, shot himself in the head a month before I graduated from high school. My father had promised for years he wouldn t do the same. I know the pain and shame it causes.
Then he changed his mind or at least that part of his mind he could still control. I ve lived a full life, he said. I don t want to be mourned; I want to be celebrated.
Six times in the next twelve weeks my father attempted to end his life. We tried every remedy imaginable, from counseling to electroconvulsive therapy. Yet we couldn t surmount his core challenge: He had lost a reason to live.
My family, always a bit hyperfunctional, dove in. My older brother took over the family real estate business; my younger sister helped research medical treatments.
But I m the narrative guy. For three decades, I had devoted my life to exploring the stories that give our lives meaning from the tribal gather- ings of
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the ancient world to the chaotic family dinners of today. I have long been consumed by how stories connect and divide us on a societal level, how they define and deflate us on a personal level.
Given this interest, I began to wonder: If my dad was facing a narrative problem, at least in part, maybe it demanded a narrative solution. Maybe what my father needed was a spark to restart his life story.
One Monday morning I sat down and did the simplest, most restor- ative thing I could imagine.
I sent my dad a question.
What were your favorite toys as a child?
What happened next changed not only him, but everyone around him, and ultimately led me to reevaluate how we all achieve meaning, balance, and joy in our lives.
This is the story of what happened next, and what we all can learn from it.
This is the story of the Life Story Project.
The Story of your Life
Stop for a second and listen to the story going on in your head. It s there, somewhere, in the background. It s the story you tell others when you first meet them; it s the story you tell yourself when you visit a meaningful place, when you flip through old photographs, when you celebrate an achievement, when you rush to the hospital. It s the story of who you are, where you came from, where you dream of going in the future. It s the high point of your life, the low point, the turning point. It s what you believe in, what you fight for, what matters most to you. It s the story of your life.
And that story isn t just part of you. It is you in a fundamental way. Life is the story you tell yourself.
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Given this interest, I began to wonder: If my dad was facing a narrative problem, at least in part, maybe it demanded a narrative solution. Maybe what my father needed was a spark to restart his life story.
One Monday morning I sat down and did the simplest, most restor- ative thing I could imagine.
I sent my dad a question.
What were your favorite toys as a child?
What happened next changed not only him, but everyone around him, and ultimately led me to reevaluate how we all achieve meaning, balance, and joy in our lives.
This is the story of what happened next, and what we all can learn from it.
This is the story of the Life Story Project.
The Story of your Life
Stop for a second and listen to the story going on in your head. It s there, somewhere, in the background. It s the story you tell others when you first meet them; it s the story you tell yourself when you visit a meaningful place, when you flip through old photographs, when you celebrate an achievement, when you rush to the hospital. It s the story of who you are, where you came from, where you dream of going in the future. It s the high point of your life, the low point, the turning point. It s what you believe in, what you fight for, what matters most to you. It s the story of your life.
And that story isn t just part of you. It is you in a fundamental way. Life is the story you tell yourself.
<
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Autoren-Porträt von Bruce Feiler
Bruce Feiler
Bibliographische Angaben
- Autor: Bruce Feiler
- 2021, 368 Seiten, mit farbigen Abbildungen, Maße: 13,8 x 21 cm, Kartoniert (TB), Englisch
- Verlag: PENGUIN BOOKS
- ISBN-10: 1101980516
- ISBN-13: 9781101980514
- Erscheinungsdatum: 13.08.2021
Sprache:
Englisch
Pressezitat
One of those books that s so profoundly aligned with the zeitgeist that you end up underlining the whole book. . . . Bruce Feiler is the perfect person to lead us on this journey. Arianna Huffington, Thrive Global This is a remarkably poignant read about the pivotal moments in our lives. Bruce Feiler gets to the heart of how turning points shape us and how we can shape them. The wisdom and stories in this book will change the way you tell your own story. Adam Grant, bestselling author of Originals and Give and Take
Crammed with cutting-edge research and compelling real-world examples, Life Is in the Transitions provides a framework of striking originality that explodes with thought-provoking insights. It has profound implications for how we view and handle the transitions voluntary and involuntary that increasingly disrupt our lives. And it s one of the rare books that is a pleasure to read in the moment and impossible to forget once you ve finished the last page. Gretchen Rubin, bestselling author of The Happiness Project and The Four Tendencies
I don t know what s more astonishing, the range of stories Bruce Feiler has found in asking people about their lives, or the wisdom he extracts from them. There is no more powerful reminder that the stories we inherit define success and that definition constantly needs updating. This beautiful book is an indispensable guide to accepting change as it really is, rather than what it s supposed to be and becoming who we really are. Charles Duhigg, author of bestsellers The Power of Habit and Smarter Faster Better
Life Is in the Transitions is essential reading for anyone in the act of becoming which is to say, all of us. Timely, wise and ultimately uplifting, the 15th book from Savannah native and self-described lifestorian Bruce Feiler (The Council of Dads) offers an
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insightful, pragmatic toolkit for navigating the unexpected, uncertain and often upending disruptions of our lives, and for rewriting the next chapters in our ever-changing stories. Charleston Post & Courier
[Feiler] offers in this insightful work timely suggestions for anyone adapting to significant life changes . . . He also presents evidence discrediting the notion of the midlife crisis and demonstrates that everyone s life contains multiple significant upheavals and uncertainties, which should thus be accepted as normal, contrary to conventional wisdom. The findings buttress practical suggestions for responding to major change, including identifying emotions, giving up old mindsets, testing alternatives, and seeking help from others. This logical, persuasive resource will resonate with any self-help reader. Publishers Weekly
This highly recommended title couldn t be more timely. . . . Feiler details a model for life transitions based on thousands of interviews with people from all walks of life and tells readers how to memorialize changes and give up old mind-sets. A helpful bonus is the complete outline for writing one s own story or that of others. Library Journal
An engaging consideration of how people navigate the highs and lows in their lives . . . [Feiler s] relaxed, informal style is reassuring, and the numerous anecdotes gleaned from his wide variety of interview subjects keep the narrative fresh. His encouraging counsel will appeal to many. Booklist
In Life Is in the Transitions, Bruce Feiler listens to, synthesizes, and helps make meaning of the American story at this complicated moment. With a big, open heart, he helps us all better understand our own stories, what it means to be human and how to navigate challenges and change. Along the way, he powerfully reminds us of the singular importance of honoring each other s stories and lives through listening. Dave Isay, founder, Storycorps
"Bruce Feiler has a real knack for helping us see what is not obvious but is right in front of our eyes. In this clear, terrifically compelling book, full of instructive examples, he names and describes the lifequake personal transitions that affect so many of us today and offers genuine wisdom, valuable counsel, and moving inspiration that make the journey easier. Read this book to open your eyes and lighten your heart! William Ury, co-author of Getting to Yes and author of Getting to Yes with Yourself
[Feiler] offers in this insightful work timely suggestions for anyone adapting to significant life changes . . . He also presents evidence discrediting the notion of the midlife crisis and demonstrates that everyone s life contains multiple significant upheavals and uncertainties, which should thus be accepted as normal, contrary to conventional wisdom. The findings buttress practical suggestions for responding to major change, including identifying emotions, giving up old mindsets, testing alternatives, and seeking help from others. This logical, persuasive resource will resonate with any self-help reader. Publishers Weekly
This highly recommended title couldn t be more timely. . . . Feiler details a model for life transitions based on thousands of interviews with people from all walks of life and tells readers how to memorialize changes and give up old mind-sets. A helpful bonus is the complete outline for writing one s own story or that of others. Library Journal
An engaging consideration of how people navigate the highs and lows in their lives . . . [Feiler s] relaxed, informal style is reassuring, and the numerous anecdotes gleaned from his wide variety of interview subjects keep the narrative fresh. His encouraging counsel will appeal to many. Booklist
In Life Is in the Transitions, Bruce Feiler listens to, synthesizes, and helps make meaning of the American story at this complicated moment. With a big, open heart, he helps us all better understand our own stories, what it means to be human and how to navigate challenges and change. Along the way, he powerfully reminds us of the singular importance of honoring each other s stories and lives through listening. Dave Isay, founder, Storycorps
"Bruce Feiler has a real knack for helping us see what is not obvious but is right in front of our eyes. In this clear, terrifically compelling book, full of instructive examples, he names and describes the lifequake personal transitions that affect so many of us today and offers genuine wisdom, valuable counsel, and moving inspiration that make the journey easier. Read this book to open your eyes and lighten your heart! William Ury, co-author of Getting to Yes and author of Getting to Yes with Yourself
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