The Shelf Life of a Secret--Will The Shit Show Ever End? (ePub)

Are you tired of the never ending shit show? If so, you're not alone. It's not you. It's your brain. All those stress hormones you were inadvertently given as a child forever altered the emotional part of your brain and left its traumatic imprint on your soul. When you least expect it, you are either paralyzed with fear or stuck in an uncontrollable blind rage. But what do you do about it? The Shelf Life of a Secret is NOT a self help book, and I'm not a therapist.

This is a candid, raw, and brutally honest memoir written for all of us. It spans forty years of trying to make sense of an abusive past, trying to find a sense of normalcy, and trying to navigate the tricky waters of relationships, marriage, divorce, and parenting. Secrets should absolutely have a shelf life; otherwise, you may find yourself at the bottom of yet another bottle or perhaps six feet under. Why does a seemingly successful divorced mother of four have a ticking time bomb for a brain just waiting to sabotage everything in her life? What role does your childhood have in your everyday decisions? Why all the suicidal thoughts? Why all the addictions? Why does the wounded child unexpectedly appear needing to be loved? Are sex and intimacy the same? What is a love addict? Why are these childhood traumatic experiences still in my head? Why won't they go away? When will I be normal? When will my brain calm the f*ck down? Why am I so uncomfortable being vulnerable? How much longer do I have to fight the painful core issues of abandonment, abuse and neglect? Why do Facebook posts of my father raising his other family still sting? Why did my mother stay married to the man who sexually assaulted me and then tell me, "You are ruining this family. Jesus has forgiven him and so have I"? So many unanswered questions. I finally realized I'm just messed up, but aren't we all? At least a little? What do we do now and how do we quiet down our brains and find some sort of peace?